I’m so excited we’re doing this series, White Flag. The story of Jonah is amazing. We get to address some questions like,
“Why do you run when things get hard?”
“Who is really in charge of your life?”
“When God asks big things from you, are you willing to listen?”
“When things don’t go your way, how do you handle it?”
“What will it take for you to wave the White Flag and let God be in control?”

Here’s what has got me so pumped- it’s talking about topics like these which lays the groundwork for God to do amazing things in people’s lives. For God’s spirit to move people’s hearts from feeling burdened & weary, to experiencing His grace and love. Case and point: Katie & Mikki. They’ve been coming to Forefront for 5 months. Mikki had some experience with church before this, Katie hadn’t really been around church at all until now. As roommates, they saw our website and decided to “give it a go.” Sure enough, they are both excited about what God is doing in their lives, serving with our Student Ministry, and connecting in ways that only point to God’s amazing work.

For Mikki and Katie, it was finally the time to go from seeing through a fuzzy lens, and getting clear sight from God about life. Living it with eyes wide open- which means coming to the realization that it’s time to wave the White Flag. Check out their stories…

Mikki & Katie Baptism from Forefront Church on Vimeo.

Seriously. I love watching God move through Forefront Church.
Got a story about how God has used His church here at Forefront to change your life? Email it to jason@forefront.org. I’d love to hear it.

Oh, and yesterday we showed White Flag Challenge #2: Paintball Edition. It wasn’t pretty.

White Flag Challenge #2: Paintball from Forefront Church on Vimeo.

We pray together every night baby.
I always end with, “God, thank you for letting me be Chloe’s daddy. Amen.”
With every beat of my heart, I mean it. You’re a gift.
But tonight, you broke down your big ol’ daddy to a puddle of emotion.
As we opened our eyes you looked at me.
I drown in those baby blues every single time you bat your lashes.
You’ve got me whooped.
You’re mommy and sissy have the same eyes.
I don’t stand a chance.
As you gazed into my face, you looked intently as you whispered-

“I’m glad I get to be your Chloe. You’re the best daddy God made for me.”

I just wrestled to not cry when you said the words.
I know when I cry you get worried that I’m hurt.
I tucked you in and laid you down to bed.
As I finally laid down to rest and waited for mommy to fall asleep, I lost it.
Because even though you believe I’m the best daddy…
I’m gonna make mistakes.
Wait, I’ve made mistakes already, ugh.
I ignore you while I play with my phone.
When you want to color, I blow you off because the news is on.
As I’m going over my sermon, you always want to sit on my lap.
I focus on church stuff, when I instead should wrestle & have a dance party.
I don’t want to miss another dance party with you.
I want to be an example for you.
I want to show you how to be loved.
I want to show you how much Jesus loves you.
I pray you see it through all my flaws and screw ups.
So, when those boys start trying to see more than your baby blues…
Tell ‘em to slow their roll.
Because you know a thing or two about what real love looks like.
And even though I make mistakes.
I love you little pookie.
And one day you’re gonna hear all the silly stories about you in sermons.
The embarrassing photos on Facebook & Twitter.
And you’re gonna read these posts I’ve written to you.
And the letters I’ve been saving for you each year on your birthday.
When you get old enough to read all this- I pray you know,
That while you feel like you’re the one getting the good end of the deal-

I’m the one who feels truly blessed to be a part of your life.
Love, Daddy

Just the other day I was talking on the phone with a fellow Forefronter. As we were chatting it up for a bit, I began to imagine he was one of the cool kids in high school. Walking the halls with a swagger that Kanye or Jay-Z would be envious of. Giving high fives & fist bumps with the other athletic kids, and enjoying “hellos and hey bros” from people as he strutted through his little kingdom, that we mere mortals call high school.

To be honest, he had confirmed many of my thoughts I was thinking in previous conversations. He was admittedly a cool guy in high school. Teachers knew him, ladies loved him, guys wanted to be him. But, there was something deeper he never mentioned when it came to being that guy.

He was lonely.

No matter how many people were around, he always felt like the only person in the room. Since he carried the facade for so long, it only made sense that it would naturally continue into adulthood. And it did. As we told stories and shared over the phone, I realized something, he wasn’t just wrestling with loneliness, he was screaming passive aggressively through the phone for a friend. For someone to talk to. What started as a simple conversation about a church event, turned into an hour and a half discourse on life, growing up, parent stories, and hashing through old wounds.

I felt for him. And, I think he heard me, but I started to get choked up a bit thinking through this. Mainly because…

In his loneliness, he’s not alone.

He isn’t alone, because- it’s you sometimes too. You go to Gel Group, attend church service, serve at events, spend time with people, hang out with your family & friends, wind down from a long day, lay your head to rest and think…

“Man, I wish I had someone to talk to about ___________.”

It’s okay. People get lonely. He’s not the only one. You’re not the only one. I’m not the only one. I get lonely, and I have human contact with friends daily. I’m not lacking for contact with people. But, contact and conversation doesn’t equal feeling together with others.

Make It Meaningful.

The next time you sit with someone- really look at them & listen.
Quit thinking about what you’re gonna say next.
Really, stop it.
You’re still thinking about it, listen to them.
What you’re THINKING of saying isn’t as important as what they ARE saying.
Be engaged.
Ask questions that matter.
If you thought someone was sad, how would you try to make them feel loved?
Okay, now do that when you are with others.
Yeah, I know it might feel weird.
Get over it.
They think you’re weird anyway.
This will just confirm it for them.
But, they’ll finally be able to say-

I have someone to talk to. And they care.

I had just dropped off my girls at school.
It’s my day off.
All I was thinking was, “My bed is waiting! Ahhhhhhhh!”
I turned the corner, and…
Traffic. At. A. Stand. Still.
Ugh.
Don’t these people know my day off is freakin’ important?!
Then I saw it.
A broken down car with the lights blinking.
People flying by her. Not stopping to help.
Honestly, I debated it in my head.
“Help this person out, or maybe someone else will.”
“Wait, I am not that guy. Quit being a selfish bastard jerk.” (my inner dialogue censors itself sometimes)
So, I pulled around. Ran out and asked her to steer her car into the church nearby.
“Aw honey child! Bless your heart. All these people keep driving by. You’re an angel sent by God.”
Her wrinkles across her face read like a novel.
She’d been through some things in life. You could tell it from simply a glance.
Too bad nobody seemed to care enough to stop & help. They were missing an interaction beyond words.
During that time, exactly 41 cars drove past me pushing in the rain.
More drove by before I got out to help.
She thanked me, but I did it because it’s what I’m supposed to do.
“Baby, you’re so sweet. I was praying God would send an angel. I just didn’t know he’d send one with colorful tattoos and those lovely big earrings. You’re precious.”
(Insert awkward moment where I’m dumbfounded as to what to say)
“Ma’am, my dad always taught me to love people, and so that’s what I try and do.”
“You mean both dad’s right? Child you must know Jesus if you’ll get out in the rain for this old lady.”
“Well, ma’am, I’m actually a pastor.”
“Whew, looking like that?! Lord bless you. We need more ministers who don’t care about fancy suits. Bless your heart.”

What just happend?!
No clue this interaction was going to go on like this.
Norma and I talked in the rain for about 15-20 minutes until her son came and picked her up.
My heart (while torn at first), decided to do what’s right instead of being selfish.
I came home, laid down for a bit, and woke up to this Facebook message:

When you want to say no – quit being selfish.
When you’ve got some where to be – it can wait.
When you think the world revolves around you – it doesn’t.
When you think someone else will help – you are the someone.
When you think no one is watching – they are. intently.
When you help someone thinking they’ll learn a lesson in love – you’re the one who gets schooled in love.

Norma, you’re a saint. You rocked my world with God’s love/truth today.
I’m glad your car was broke down so God could use you to break me down in the process.

- Jason

Over the past few weeks there has been a flurry of people posting photos like these, or catchy little meme photos with the saying,

“Never regret anything, because at one time it was exactly what you wanted.”

In junior high I stole things.
In the third grade a girl touched me & I her. It was in a bad way, and we knew it.
In ’89 I lied to my parents about getting beat up & threw my bike in a ditch so I could get a new one.
In high school I used girls & tossed them aside like Post-it Notes.
In college I broke the rules because I hated the system.
In my early years of ministry I struggled with porn.
In my adult years I entertained my ego and gave in to pride.
In my life, I’ve…
hurt people.
let down my wife.
been absent when my girls needed me.
lied.
stolen.
abused.
chosen addiction.
stood before a judge and deserved a penalty.

Never regret anything?

When faced with a question, I wonder what God has to say about it?

Just as you used to offer the parts of your body in slavery to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer them in slavery to righteousness leading to holiness. When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the control of righteousness. What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death! But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. -Romans 6:19-23

Shame and regret are some of the very emotions and heart conditions that lead my heart to repentance. My heart feeling heavy from the sin I’ve committed brings me to a place where I realize my need for forgiveness, redemption, God’s grace, etc. Adam & Eve were ashamed after eating the apple, Jonah was ashamed after running from God, the woman caught in adultery was ashamed in front of Jesus, and the Bible paints the disciples shame and regret numerous times as they fall short and let God down.

When I think about my past, and the stupidity I knowingly walked into on so many occasions… did it make me smile or happy? Absolutely. Sin is fun, and if you don’t think it is- you’re not doing it right. Satan doesn’t tempt us into something we wouldn’t enjoy. He entices us with things we’d LOVE to grab at. But, when I think about these things, it breaks my heart. The people I injured. The hearts I broke. The friends I destroyed. Never regret anything?

I’m growing into the man God is working on me to be with each stride and day that goes by. As I look forward, I love what I see. As I look back, I’m saddened by my past. While I’ve learned from it, there are some things I would love to go back and change. Knowing what and WHO I know now…

Shame and regret can bring us to a place where our hearts are ready to experience true love, grace, and redemption.

Carol Of The Bells from Forefront Church on Vimeo.

I loved our Christmas Eve/Eve Service. It was a great way to wrap up 2011. The year had some amazing things take place…

• Sending a team to Joplin to help with the clean-up relief. So pumped we were able to be a part of that.
• Packing an 18 wheeler with supplies and sending it down to Alabama for hurricane relief. The news came out a did a story, it was awesome to see something on the news that positive. You guys rock!
• Two teams to Vietnam to finish the water system for 600+ people to have clean water and build dorms for kids who need a place to sleep. Our impact there over the last few years has transformed that village. This year is going to be even better!
• 17 people to Mexico to build homes for families in need. That valley is forever changed with the love our high school ministry has shared there. If you have time off during the summer and haven’t gone yet, you are TOTALLY MISSING OUT! Go this year, seriously.
• Working with PIN Homeless ministry. We have groups making lunches, people serving, and donations every week to help aid this work. I love it.
• Our Children’s Ministry collected hundreds of pais of socks for the homeless.
• Collecting supplies & throwing a huge baby shower for the moms of CPC at our warehouse space! We discussed whether or not to give other churches the opportunity to do this and not do it in 2012. The CPC reps told us they LOVE what the ladies & church have done. It’s the best shower they have all year! You guys are fantastic!
• 88 kids in the special needs program and their siblings were given an amazing Christmas thanks to the gifts you gave. There are a lot of things we could be doing with our time, but giving back to the community is HUGE. I love that our church isn’t just about what happens on Sundays and in small groups, but we are actually OUT IN THE COMMUNITY.
• We saw the school lunch program happening and 100 kids have better food in Vietnam because of you. I was able to see this first hand, and let me tell you, there is no greater feeling than seeing the love of Jesus transcend in a practical way with people. Love it.
• Watching as 35 people made a decision to follow Jesus. This number is actually more, but since we don’t film every baptism, we don’t know an exact number. Anytime I get down, this is the thing that keeps me going. Every other week, and then some, people are coming to Jesus. And… those are just the salvation stories. There are dozens, even hundreds more who are making decisions every week in other ways.
• 7 Marriages that were on the brink of divorce decided to work it out. And they’re thriving! I cannot say enough how big it is that we value families and aid them in following Jesus. If you’re hurting alone, there’s no excuse. We’re here for you. We love you, please come talk to us. We are here to help.
• Saw 600+ people at our Christmas Eve/Eve Service. 3 years ago we did this and had 455 people. I was blown away then, and with all the craziness that God’s church at Forefront has seen… I was blown away again as we saw so many new faces of YOUR FRIENDS there. Remember, they want to come to church and are receptive to it. The one thing holding them back? YOU. Take a step and talk with them about God, church, your faith. You’ll be amazed at what God can do.
• The next day we went to over 58 different places and handed out thank gifts & goodies for people working on Christmas Eve. This is one of my favorite things we do every year. When we could be having a service about Jesus, for us, feeling cozy in a building, singing songs and enjoying ourselves… we went out and honored others. Because we didn’t feel right having a service for us while people are away form their homes & families working. The hospitals, naval bases, fire stations, police stations, grocery stores, McDonald house, and more were all so thankful. I love that you guys care more about others than yourselves.

So, today was a mix of sermon writing, phone calls, and emails. I wanted to post this morning, but my head wasn’t around it. Tonight my lovely wife, Carrie, is with her discipleship partner, so I have some time to finally write with a clear head. The question that was posed in yesterday’s post:

“What if Marie died? Would God still be good?”
“Would his love, grace, and mercy- still abound as it did the day before?”

The “I went to Bible College, pastored for awhile, and preached this topic before” side of me knows the Biblical answer. But the “Jason who wrestles with his broken past” side of me wrestles with this (if I’m allowed to be honest). There is a truth here that I know, and a human heart side of me that still hurts. My hurt doesn’t change the truth, but I need to be honest with my feelings.

God saved/healed my Aunt Marie. So everyone celebrated and said how great God is. Now, I know if Marie had died, it wouldn’t have been bad for her. She is a Christian, and she is confident of the hope Jesus sealed on the cross. But, does death change the state of God’s divine nature? Not just death, but do the bad, ugly, and awful things in this world mean that God is not as holy/gracious/loving as he claims?

His state of grace and love doesn’t change because my circumstances aren’t the way I want them to be. If I pray and he heals my aunt, he’s good. If I pray and he doesn’t heal my aunt- the world is dark, sinful, bad things happen to good and bad people… and God is still good. Living in a broken world (that we broke in Genesis 3), crap happens (filter helped catch something else). God promises to be our anchor, rock, and foundation in life. That means in the chaos of life, He is good and sustains us. When things are on cloud nine, God is good and we are thankful.

One of the things I’ve realized in difficult times is, I experience God’s love, grace, and mercy in a more profound way when storms are raging. The phrase, “School of hard knocks” rings true in this moment. It’s interesting that Jesus used storms as some of the teaching environments on more than one occasion to bring truth to His disciples. I don’t think it was by accident he chose to capitalize on those instances. I also don’t believe Jesus made the storms rage to make his point. The broken world was set off balance and we see the groans of that (Romans 8). But, when the world gets off kilter, it’s a beautiful portrayal of the work and ministry of Jesus as he steps in to use it for teaching.

The disciples are freaking out at the storm, Jesus wakes up to calm the seas, “Who is this that even the winds and waves obey him?” they ask (Mark 4:35-41, Luke 8:22-25, Matthew 8:23-27). They are in awe of Jesus, but they are still freaking out. It’s the same way with our lives when situations, well, they’re just more than we feel we can bare.

We ask, “Where is God’s involvement in all of this?”
“Are you really as good & loving as you say you are?”
“I needed you. Why didn’t you answer the prayer the way I asked?”

It’s okay to question, wrestle, and talk it out with God. He’s way bigger than your questions, so it isn’t going to rock Him. He can handle it. He created the world, people, universe, angels, heaven, etc. I’m pretty certain He’s ready for your talk with Him. I just keep coming back to a simple line in a speech given by Moses to the people of Israel as he’s going to be handing the torch to Joshua,

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6

God does not specialize in the abandonment game. No matter what example of a father you may have grown up with. God is our example of a perfect Father. A Heavenly Father. He stands by us, through the good and bad. It’s that love, faithfulness, holiness, and consistency that leaves His nature unshaken in the face of our trials and hurts.

I’m glad to have a personal relationship with God.
It’s that very relationship that gives this life purpose.

- brandedwithlove

This is my Aunt Marie.
In the middle of the night on a Thursday she had a stroke.
She was found unresponsive early the next morning.
Straight from a stroke into a coma.
For 4 consecutive days they could not find any brain activity.
None.
They measured through tests, to determine if they should “take her off machines” the doctors noted.

The doctors would make a final decision at 9:00pm Monday night.
At 5:30pm, Marie sat up, asked where she was, and wanted something to eat.

A miracle.

Yes, they really do happen today. I’ve witnessed it.
Our family saw God through air tubes, needles, and iv lines.
Marie is different. Her demeanor has changed.
She is relearning simple motor skills again.
Her short term memory has been altered forever.
Apparently that part of the brain was without oxygen for too long.
But, she’s alive, can function, and knows that God did something miraculous.

It was a heavy week of prayer for our family.
Through Facebook/Twitter, hundreds upon hundreds of you were praying across the country.
The resounding comment we got over and over was, “Man, God is so Good!”

I agree whole-heartedly with that statement.
He saved my aunt from death.
I’m thankful she is left with minimal damage
But…

What if Marie died? Would God still be good?
Would his love, grace, and mercy- still abound as it did the day before?

We’ll talk about that tomorrow.

I read a bunch of differnt stuff around the web. One of the things I do is keep up with other churches doing great things to see how we can learn, get better, and approach God is a fresh way. Our family celebrates Advent, and we try and teach our girls about it. If you’re interested in doing so, it’s not too late. Village Church in TX has some great resources for you and your family to get rolling today. Here is a brief snippet of their post:

“Christ is coming. He has come, and He will come again. This is the message of Advent.

Though Advent is often neglected in many contemporary churches, it has a long history of remembrance. It is a season of waiting, a time of anxious and eager anticipation for the coming (advent) of Christ to His bride.

Though it overlaps with modern Christmas celebrations, it is quite different. Whereas Christmas tends to be a season of noise and commotion, Advent is a time to slow down and reflect. It is a season to consider the first coming of Christ and patiently ponder His second.”

Here’s a short video to encourage you in the process and you can download a PDF guide for your family here.

Advent: God With Us from The Village Church on Vimeo.

Ever been called something that hurt you to the core?
A label stamped on you because of something you did?
Well, Jesus came to abolish those labels.
Don’t believe the lies Satan & society have placed on you.
You were bought with a price.
God loves you.
You are special.
Unique.
Loved.
Important.
Needed.
Desired by God.

At Forefront, you’re not a label, number, or statistic.
You’re a person. A soul in need of a savior.
We’ve all messed up and wish we could go back and change things.
We all can use a second chance.

(more about these images here)